Magic Dust

Breaking News: Injured Cubs SS Nomar Garciaparra could be back as early as two days from now. Drawing from his wealth of experience in mystical machinations, manager Dusty Baker has hatched a plan to magically saw off Nomar's lower body and replace it with Jason Dubois'.

Asked about the slight of hand, Baker said, "We need Nomar badly plus I want to change the impression that I don't like playing rookies."